Well, this would be my fifth attempt

Have I learned anything in those four prevoius attempts? I… I don’t know…

First attempt was in August 2023. I was drawing other people’s minecraft skins. It was some sort of Nation RP server I was participating in. It took away most of my time during the years of 2022-2023. I was also still drawing countryballs during that time. I eventually stopped drawing in October 2023 and moved to music production and animating. I started working on The Magician about that time 8/”23 - 10/”23

In between I started animating, producing music and writing. (2 month break)

Second attempt was in December 2023. I became motivated after watching that one Pewdiepie’s video on drawing. I focused mostly on anime style since I wanted to draw that…I guess Oridays had some influence here too… I’ve found a free figure drawing video series online and I started to follow it. I soon realised that it was way too complex for me and I decided to focus on gesture drawing. After drawing 100 gestures I lost interest again… That was around January 2024. At that time I finished beating the story of Sunless Lands. 12/”23 - 1/”24

In between I focused an animating in AA, figuring out how blender works, and writing an outline for the story of “Sunless Lands” (5 month break)

Third attempt was made in June 2024. I started drawing poes again and then pivoted to studying from a book I found. “Dynamic bible”. It offered the most fundamental of fundamental lessons on art that I could found. So I followed it. I started drawing fully traditional and with a fineliner pen. Circles, elipses, boxes, cones, tubes. I went back to gesture drawing and I drew an additional 100 poses (in much better quality than last time). After that I tried to figure out how the pelvis and ribcage fit in space. I had next to no success. I went back to that free figure drawing video series I found. While I did manage to get further than last time and my figure drawings were more 3d and better looking than last time, the more I practiced and went further, the less 3d coherent my drawings became. I finished watching the video and doing the exercises about the head and then I moved to do the exercise that focused on the body. The drawings of the body that came out ware so 3d discoherent that I gave up. I clearly still DID NOT UNDERSTAND how three dimensional forms function in space. In August 2024 decided to take a break. 6/”24 - 8/”24

I didn’t do anything during this time. (2 month break)

Fourth attempt was made in October 2024 when I discovered Drawabox. I went through Lesson 0, 1 and 2. It took some time. But I think was pleased with the prgress I made. I took a two week break from drawing until late January 2025. I found on youtube the full “Dynamic sketching” video series and decided to follow it. I finished week 1, 2 and 3. I was drawing boxes again. Then I just stopped. I wasn’t tired and I wasn’t burned out. I don’t really know why… I think I found no reason to continue drawing, no internal motivation, no real creative will. I have some stories I’ve written (Sunless Lands) but I’ve never really found any real desire to illustrate them.

Have I been trying to do something I don’t really want? I do not know.

It does hurt me to not know what exactly I want out of drawing.

Hey, Atleast I’m having fun drawing spaceships :)